I am done apologizing for getting fired up, angry, mad, or for going on the warpath. I am sick of sweating the petty shit. And I am tired of people telling me how I should be feeling or what I should be thinking. Makes me want to say, who are you to tell me what I should be thinking, writing, or defending? I am not a pawn, puppet, or dumbass. I have a mind and if that offends anyone, too bad. I spent too much of my life being sorry. For nor good reason. If I am passionate about believing in what I do, standing up for what I think is right, or fighting what I think is wrong, then that is how I choose to live my life. I am not livestock in line for the slaughterhouse. I am a Lakota woman, if anyone tells you I am supposed to be docile and inila, you heard wrong. I am tired of bullshit. I am tired of the people of the state thinking they can continue to claim they “give us everything” and yet they live on our land, take our children out of our home, and tell us how a good family structure is supposed to be when they are the ones who put the dis and the funk in dysfunction in any of our family relationships…for generations. I am tired of them stereo-typing us and then getting offended when we call them racist. I am tired of that stupid divide. They started it, we continue it…its stupid, hateful and a vicious circle. I am tired of people apologizing to me because they are white. I don’t care. I don’t care if you or you can go generations back to prove how lily white you are, if you have a good heart I will think you’re cool beans and frybread. However, don’t apologize to me for the sins of your people…stand up to your own and tell them they are still fucked up for being ignorant. I’ll tell my people, in fact I write and email every tribal president and have yet to get an answer from one of them. I’ll tell my people to support each other, we have enough people putting us down.
I’m tired of people thinking we were uncivilized nubes when in fact, we have always been brilliant.
What other people stand up for all the branches of their family tree?
Yes, that is us. Brilliantly, wild, hostile Lakota. You know we been representing for hundreds of years.
“You want to be sorry all your life? Just live.” -my mom
Ain’t gotta lie to kick it